Searching

7 October 2010

So, perhaps what is called for now is a combination of
  listen, try and listen again.
  Don’t become attached to any particular idea.
  Just put it out there and listen to hear if it is the right direction.

It’s like a game of 20 Questions…with God.

I am reminded that it is a sacred time,
  like those moments before my mom passed.
  I was invited to witness, but more than that. I lent my hand.
  I was an active participant in the dance. 

  I was just clear that I wasn’t the lead.

So, it is now. I am not fatalistically – or through blind faith –
  waiting for what comes next.
  But neither am I rushing forward from a place

   of fear or ego or intellectual blindness.
  I am moving forward based on what I perceive to be the guidance of spirit

  (to the best of my ability).

Perhaps this is another sacred dance.
  I don’t know the outcome, only that its purpose
  is to move me toward this place I am supposed to be going.
  I can do it. I have been given a strong mind and heart for a reason.
  I am learning how to offer them in service of spirit, 

  rather than rampaging forward on their own.
  

I am learning to listen and hear.
  I have learned humility.
  I will be given what I need.
  I am no longer feeling the fear – it seems to have dissipated, for now anyway.

Life is a prayer.